thoughts about ish
Instead of only talking about how my day was today, I’m going to talk about what’s been really bugging me.
On my myspace I say “I realize something new everyday.” Now this isn’t something that I’ve only realized today, but for the past few months or so. It’s how much people suck and how everyone has conformed to be exactly like each other. I’m not saying that I’m different than everyone else; I do have qualities in my personality that are like other people’s personalities. However, I take that quality and I make it my own. Everyone else is just the same. I can’t take it anymore. I used to think that the people I talk to everyone didn’t care about what other people thought. I didn’t think that they really valued their opinions. But the past few months tell me otherwise. I’ve always known that people are mean, but I didn’t know that they were all mean in the same way. Well, I guess that’s not the complete truth, but it’s close. Everyone gets mad about the little things. I know I’m stubborn and I used to fight with everyone about anything, but every since my birthday I’ve chilled out. I’ve become a little more understanding towards people and I don’t have the energy to fight with people. After awhile it gets to be boring and lame. But that doesn’t stop people from getting mad at me for the little things. I don’t even have to do anything, and that’s exactly what sets people off, not doing something for them. I really can’t do it anymore. I can’t last that long with people always saying I’m at fault. I have my flaws and I do things wrong, but not everything is my fault. So what I’ve been doing for the past few months is just ignoring people when they decide to stop talking to me. I’m sick of being treated like crap for no reason and I refuse to put up with it anymore. I also tell people that I don’t have friends, which is not a complete lie. The only people I ever hang out with anymore are my dad, Melany, Katelyn, Sam, Bo and their friends. However, I don’t care anymore. I like hanging out with all of them. They’re all fun people, and they don’t have short tempers. I know I don’t see any of them on a daily basis besides Dad and Katelyn, but they’re probably the best people to be around. They’re all pretty much family. They may be all I have right now, but they make life worth living for. Katelyn turned into the reason I go to school when Konnor left and when she was going through tough times. Sam and Bo are my favorite people to hang out with when I want to get out of the house. Melany is my best friend and I will always need her. Dad, though we fight, is my best friend; I tell him everything and he takes care of me whether I want him to or not. I don’t tell anyone half as much of what I tell them. In other news, today was okay. All my classes went fine; I slept in lunch. After school sucked. Practice was boring and I didn’t even talk to anyone for two hours. It was the weirdest experience ever. Though there are some people who would think it totally normal for me to not be talking. Then me and dad ordered chinese food, delicious. We’ve been craving it for so long. Then on CSI some guy got his tongue split. I’m really not sure what’s its called, but like a snake, it was pretty gross. That was the day. It was not fun. And I definitely have to reconsider a few things over the summer. Keep on reading and remember: I’m Jackie and I don’t know crap.
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AuthorJust a 20something trying to get by in life. Archives
April 2020
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